Friday, July 30, 2010

facebook temporary deactivation ~_~ HEARTBREAK~_~

assalamualaikum warahmatullahiwabarakatuh

starting yesterday...i decided to deactivate my fb temporarily... so that i don't have to think so much... its just bothering me...i couldn't stop myself from viewing my bf's wall n whenever i saw girl write or leave a comment...my heart ache like crazy... i know i shouldn't behave that way...i mean...my feeling shouldn't behave that way...
it's just i can't control it...n seeing most of my close friends engage or getting married...it ache's even more...so i decided that i'll just convey all my thoughts only on my blog...for the current moment....at least till my exam's over... the reasons all starts with the letter (i):

1. i think I'm getting jealous and its dangerous!....probably because I'm far a part from him...n thinking that i could loose him in any second...terrifies me...it's not because i didn't believe him...it's just the happen to be this way...the pain is too much for me to endure...

2. i envy my of my close friends...they already find their true love..n getting engaged is a prove that their partner (bf/gf) are 100% sure with their love...while me???? lucky I'm studying far away...so that i can buy some times n give reasons for not being in an 'engaged' world yet.

3. i am proud to know that most of my close friends getting married and leads a wonderful life n happy weds...its just i couldn't stop myself from thinking, is my life going to be the same way as they have right now when I'm getting married SOMEDAY? eh, ada ke orang mahu kahwin dengan aku?hahaha....

4. it's bothering me....it makes me feel painful...am i YSL*???? (*Young Single Lonely) hahaha...maybe the answer is yes.lol~

5. in love with someone and to be love by the one that i love....is a wonderful feeling...but love only is not enough...the promise is important...n i feel like I'm still far from the promise...n i wonder...will i be married???

6. i have my own decision... if i still single when my age turn 30...I'll adopt a baby...^_^but my mum said...if an unmarried women adopt a baby...the chances for her to get married are as thin as a paper...but for me, only He knows what is the best for His slave ^_^ so, piccolina bambina, tu non si puo piangere...

this are all the reasons why i deactivate my fb account...you may find it funny and irrelevant...but this are what i have in my small mind...

kenakalan aku di waktu dulu membuatkan aku sedar...macam ni rasanya sakit dan perit...yang aku buat pada orang dulu....SERVE ME RIGHT! hahhaaha

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

13/07/2010 extended

mission not accomplished for today:

bahawasanya nurul balqis binti mohd salleh telah gagal mencari kipas...sumenye out of stock... dari saturn...media markt...kardtstadt...Real...saturn yg kt real...babies shop (try gak kt cn T_T) dan pelbagai tmpt lg....wa!!!kesabaranku hanya Allah s.w.t yg tahu...

mission accomplished for today:

laptop baru smpai...pas2 bruni selesai menggodek dan mmbersihkan inner fan dlm laptop lama...dan berjaya mengetahui punca dtgnye bunyik2 tikus dlmlaptop..eekkeeke...alhamdulillah...

13/7/2010 HP's birthday

alhamdulillah...setelah hampir dua bulan menunggu...akhirnya laptop yg aku beli sampai ^_^ tp yg sedihnye...everything in Deutsch T_T...xpelah.yg penting leh install sume Pro-E, Maple, JAVA, acad...yg paling penting skalila...huhuhu

Sunday, July 4, 2010

~cinta~

is it true when we can't say the golden words "i love you" means we stop loving the person that we love??? for me...it's different...for me...

love~ such a complicated word...such a complicated thing with such an amazing feeling...i just wonder...can love bring happiness for the rest of my life? can we live just with love? i really want the one i love tell me these... "wo pau hu ni" ...instead of "wo ai ni" only...

apakan...hahahha...just my thought at this current moment.... from all the things happen around me...and around the people i care the most...make me afraid of the word marriage...hahaha...because im afraid that my future husband will deceive me...or will torture me...torture doesn't mean with cane or kick or slapping...but also with psycho way....wa...takutnye bayangkan kalo my life partner treat me like that....ya Allah, moga2 Kau kurniakan hamba-Mu yang dapat membimbing aku yg sedikit nakal ini...^_^ (when i wanna get married???just Allah knows about it ^_^...now its time for me to study) huhuhu